The Alternative Press
Your Neighborhood News Online
Showing articles in Main Street Musings
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Valentine’s Day Hunk
January 23, 2012Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and I’m not taking it too seriously—at least not in my parody ad for a &ld...
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The Waiting is the Hardest Part
January 16, 2012Going to the doctor isn’t fun. You wait for hours. You answer lots of personal questions. You get p...
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Freshly Pressed
January 9, 2012If you’ve never heard of Freshly Pressed, it’s a feature on WordPress that promotes blogs. Each weekday WordPress selects ...
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Why Snowboarding’s Not So Gnarly
January 2, 2012If you haven’t heard, asphyxiation and foot binding aren’t just for waterboarding anymore. Water torture has a froze...
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Holiday Cards: Signed, Sealed, Delivered (and Outsourced)
December 19, 2011December is a time of year steeped in tradition—a time when we catch the holiday spirit, a time when we celebrate with fami...
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A Trip Down PMS Lane with Facebook’s Timeline (Social Network Parody)
December 16, 2011Dear Facebook User, As you know, we here at Facebook encourage you to share everything about yourself— birthdays,...
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My Jewish Santa
December 12, 2011Some things are easy to take for granted, like Christmas. People get caught up in the hoopla and forget that not everyone in the w...
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Bear Hunt in New Jersey: A Grisly Affair
December 6, 2011WARNING: This may include content that is mildly rude and not appropriate for young children, animal rights activists, or Yogi B...
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Black Friday Shopping: Santa’s Helper Comes Early
November 25, 2011I was food shopping at Stop & Shop when I witnessed a platoon of ordinary civilians brandish laser guns and storm the bakery depar...
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Thanksgiving Tradition With A Green Jello Twist
November 21, 2011“Guess what?” I tell my husband. “Your mom called. We’re hosting Thanksgiving this year.” ...
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Occupy Wall Street: A Christmas Wish List for Santa
November 15, 2011Dear Santa, It’s cold out here in Zuccotti Park. We’re peeing in buckets, sleeping in tents and having unb...
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Dinner Group: Rules to Play By
November 14, 2011As humans, we have a natural tendency to form groups to fulfill our social needs. We enter into playgroups as toddlers, where we...
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Northeast Storm Renders Us Powerless . . . Over TV
November 7, 2011There are certain things you take for granted in the suburbs, like garbage pick up, recycling pick up, and your neighbor’s Oak t...
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When Friends Let Friends Get Tattoos
November 4, 2011When my friend Maya told me she wanted a tattoo, I prayed she meant permanent eyebrows. I personally dislike the look of tatt...
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Halloween Candy Is For Suckers
October 24, 2011Buying candy for Halloween is a crapshoot. If you overshoot, you’re stuck with five pounds of leftover candy...
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Bah Stink Bug
October 17, 2011What’s bugging New Jersey? Lots of things. Tics, bedbugs, Governor Christie . . . but it&rsq...
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Smells Like . . .
October 3, 2011My sense of smell is so keen, I can smell trouble a mile away. This allows me to do things like kno...
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School Rule: No Kids Left Behind
September 19, 2011When I was a child, we didn’t have a school rule requiring parents to designate student emergency contacts. If our parents weren...
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My Parents Ate My Homework
September 13, 2011It’s back to school time and you know what that means—conquering that immense stack of school forms before it c...
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No Cracks or Cleavage: School Dress Code Changes Views
September 13, 2011Some school administrators are giving increasing attention to cracks (not the kind in the school system). Princip...
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The Neighborhood Bitch
August 29, 2011During a recent visit to my parents house in L.A., I strolled through my old neighborhood and brooded over my mom’s d...
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A Banker’s Garden Yields a High Return
August 22, 2011When my husband, Chris, developed a passion for gardening, I was surprised. I never thought of him as the gardening typ...
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What I learned From Babies at BlogHer '11
August 15, 2011I was struck by lots of things at BlogHer '11 — a blogging conference targeted to women bloggers. As a ...
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Greetings From Home
August 8, 2011Wednesday, August 3 Dear Heather, Henry and Elizabeth, Dad and I made good time driving back home from Camp G...
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How to Stand Out at BlogHer ’11 (Without Getting Naked)
August 1, 2011When I registered last week for BlogHer '11, a conference for [mostly] women bloggers, I was excited about the prospect...